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by Dr Pallavee Walia (Psychologist)

Do’s and Don’t’s

Parenting is fulfilling but extremely challenging. Connection is an essential ingredient of any healthy, growing relationship, and leads to strong bonding. A good relationship between parents and a child depends on the equation which they share with each other, the responsibility of which lies on the shoulders of parents.

 

Children in their growing ages are like wet clay. They become how they are moulded. Therefore, good parenting decides the fate of the society. In order to make children obedient and make them stay connected to their parents, there are some things to keep in consideration while dealing with them.

Do's for a Healthy Relationship:

  1. Always keep your promises and commitments.
  2. Be the change you want to see in your child because children learn more from observing than by listening. Moreover, they love to imitate. Parents should surely take advantage of this natural instinct and train their children to perform.
  3. Always hold moral values and principles above convenience as some special incidences leave an indelible impact on the minds of young children. Parents, if wisely understand the situation, can very easily make any situation a learning experience for the lifetime of their child.
  4. Be truthful and honest with your child and instil in them from the very beginning the ability to own their mistakes instead of trying to blame peers or the situation.
  5. Make your child responsible by assigning very small tasks in a routine manner so that the mind is trained to perceive that particular task as something that is very important, can be done and has to be done by the child alone. This would have dual benefits. It would not only make the child responsible but would also boost confidence and self-esteem.
  6. Teach your child to give everyone their due respect irrespective of age, gender, color, social class, money, occupation, origins, etc.
  7. Let the child speak for himself when the situation demands it. Though it’s very tempting, don’t try to speak on behalf of your child in front of friends, relatives, family, teachers, etc. Let the child speak for himself and develop his communication skills right from the beginning.
  8. Validate your child’s feelings towards a person or situation and correct them without making him/her realize that he/she is wrong. It will stop him/her from sharing anything with you in the future.
  9. Train your child to control his/ her feelings, especially anger, and help him/her deal with them. When in very rough situations, try dealing with them with a calm mind. Tell your child about the consequences of impulsive reactions to situations.
  10. Show your love to your child verbally and through your gestures. Reward them when suitable to encourage.
  11. Always be available for your child. Take time out of your busy schedule to engage and interact with them. Ensure that you attend all possible activities in your child’s school, especially if your child is a participant.
  12. There’s nothing more important for the development of the child’s mind than spending quality family time. Children who get love, attention, care, and respect from both the parents generally have a memorable childhood and their personalities glow like nothing else.

Don'ts for a Healthy Relationship:

  1. Don’t blame your child. Rather make it a serious but guilt-free learning experience.
  2. Don’t scar your child’s mind by resorting to corporal punishment.
  3. Don’t let the child fearyour presence. Rather make your relationship so compassionate that your child looks forward to spending time with you.
  4. Don’t shout or scream. Such behaviour makes a child stubborn.
  5. Don’t dismiss your child’s ideas or feelings right away. It will create distance between both of you.
  6. Never justify your incorrect behaviour in front of the child.
  7. Don’t just preach. Rather practice.
  8. Don’t compare your child to any other child, sibling, or friend. It would develop jealousy and would hurt self-esteem.
  9. Don’t be too rigid. Let the child explore possibilities. Keep an eye on this to ensure that the learning is right.
  10. Don’t take the child for granted. Don’t imply him/her to be a burden in your lives. Show respect for his/ her feelings.
  11. Don’t humiliate or shame the child, especially in front of visitors.
  12. Don’t ‘label’ your child as good, bad, lazy, stubborn, etc.
  13. Don’t make the most choices for your child. Let him/her take a call wherever possible and suitable.

Do's for a Healthy Relationship:

  1. Always keep your promises and commitments.
  2. Be the change you want to see in your child because children learn more from observing than by listening. Moreover, they love to imitate. Parents should surely take advantage of this natural instinct and train their children to perform.
  3. Always hold moral values and principles above convenience as some special incidences leave an indelible impact on the minds of young children. Parents, if wisely understand the situation, can very easily make any situation a learning experience for the lifetime of their child.
  4. Be truthful and honest with your child and instil in them from the very beginning the ability to own their mistakes instead of trying to blame peers or the situation.
  5. Make your child responsible by assigning very small tasks in a routine manner so that the mind is trained to perceive that particular task as something that is very important, can be done and has to be done by the child alone. This would have dual benefits. It would not only make the child responsible but would also boost confidence and self-esteem.
  6. Teach your child to give everyone their due respect irrespective of age, gender, color, social class, money, occupation, origins, etc.
  7. Let the child speak for himself when the situation demands it. Though it’s very tempting, don’t try to speak on behalf of your child in front of friends, relatives, family, teachers, etc. Let the child speak for himself and develop his communication skills right from the beginning.
  8. Validate your child’s feelings towards a person or situation and correct them without making him/her realize that he/she is wrong. It will stop him/her from sharing anything with you in the future.
  9. Train your child to control his/ her feelings, especially anger, and help him/her deal with them. When in very rough situations, try dealing with them with a calm mind. Tell your child about the consequences of impulsive reactions to situations.
  10. Show your love to your child verbally and through your gestures. Reward them when suitable to encourage.
  11. Always be available for your child. Take time out of your busy schedule to engage and interact with them. Ensure that you attend all possible activities in your child’s school, especially if your child is a participant.
  12. There’s nothing more important for the development of the child’s mind than spending quality family time. Children who get love, attention, care, and respect from both the parents generally have a memorable childhood and their personalities glow like nothing else.

Don'ts for a Healthy Relationship:

  1. Don’t blame your child. Rather make it a serious but guilt-free learning experience.
  2. Don’t scar your child’s mind by resorting to corporal punishment.
  3. Don’t let the child fearyour presence. Rather make your relationship so compassionate that your child looks forward to spending time with you.
  4. Don’t shout or scream. Such behaviour makes a child stubborn.
  5. Don’t dismiss your child’s ideas or feelings right away. It will create distance between both of you.
  6. Never justify your incorrect behaviour in front of the child.
  7. Don’t just preach. Rather practice.
  8. Don’t compare your child to any other child, sibling, or friend. It would develop jealousy and would hurt self-esteem.
  9. Don’t be too rigid. Let the child explore possibilities. Keep an eye on this to ensure that the learning is right.
  10. Don’t take the child for granted. Don’t imply him/her to be a burden in your lives. Show respect for his/ her feelings.
  11. Don’t humiliate or shame the child, especially in front of visitors.
  12. Don’t ‘label’ your child as good, bad, lazy, stubborn, etc.
  13. Don’t make the most choices for your child. Let him/her take a call wherever possible and suitable.

Proton pre-school is a child centric pre-school where child’s goals and objectives of learning are given more importance.

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